If you are vague, my OCD will fill in the blanks for you and most of the time it fills them with my deepest fears and insecurities. So, please don’t be vague.
What I wish I could tell my friends without sounding like a poorly adjusted nut job. In therapy they say to ask for what you need from someone, be direct. But, doing that usually ends in me getting a look from the other person that makes me experience the discomfort that I’m trying to avoid by being direct. In the real world few people are direct. We use metaphors and extravagant words instead of simply just saying how we’re feeling or what we need. I often get lost in the fluff that people add to their sentences. I have trouble differentiating between what details are important and what are not. And on the other side if you lack in detail and are vague my mind twists every word and turns them against me. So I’m just going to need everyone to just get straight to the point and be completely clear is that okay with all of you? A ridiculous request, I know! But, it’s harder than you think. Excessive use of words and the lack of words can both be used as a defense mechanism. I am usually an over explainer. I think that if I leave any detail out you will not get the full context of what I’m saying and therefore judge the situation wrong and either think poorly about any of the characters in the story, me, or simply give me poor advice about the situation. I hide behind humor and shock factor because it’s easier for me to get validation from someone smiling at my joke then to bare my soul and get empathy. So, when my friends are vague I cannot blame them. Yes, it causes me emotional turmoil but you are trying to relieve your own so I understand. But, please don’t bite my head off for asking for clarification...
-the girl with the green glasses
